Mike's Journal

An open letter to the Lincoln Bedroom

Dear Lincoln Bedroom,

I love my tent. It’s a wonderful tent. It is red and orange and I’m really happy to have it, but it’s still a tent. Being a bedroom you surely understand what a tent lacks. There’s a level of space and comfort in a room with walls and a ceiling that a tent just can’t provide, especially in places like the desert. Bedrooms are different; they are sanctuaries; comfort in a box. I like bedrooms and typically they like me. I can confidently say that you’re the first bedroom to have a problem with Mike Schwartz. How come you won’t respond to my letters? Have I done something to offend you? Did you despise the black top hat Jeff and I sent as a Lincoln's Birthday Gift?

Today is July 12; it has been seven months since my first letter. This morning Jeff and I sit in a cafe on Main Street in Teluride Colorado sipping warm cups of organic tea and coffee. For the last half hour or so we’ve been discussing how strange it is that you haven’t written back while other things named after, inspired by, or in some way related presidents of the United States are clearly in support of The Great Sitting.

A partial list follows:

Washington – Jeff and I will cross the Washington Bridge as we enter New York City.

Adams – Ryan Adams makes some great music and we listen to it sometimes in the morning before we ride our bikes.

Jefferson – Jefferson Pitcher is 1/2 of The Great Sitting.

Madison – We plan to stay with Jake and Helen in Madison Wisconsin; perhaps in a bedroom.

Monroe – Presidents like Marolyn Monroe and so do we.

Adams – Ansel Adams is a talented photographer and so is Michelle McCarron; she took some photos for our web site.

Van Buren – Ron has a Van.

Harrison – Jeff and I have both read Jim Harrison Novels on this trip.

Tyler – Tyler Hamilton is a great Cyclist that has broken his collar bone. I have broken my collar bone and I am 1/2 of The Great Sitting.

Polk – Ron has driven his van an on Polk Street in San Francisco.

Talyor – Taylor makes great guitars & Jeff rode through the redwood trees in Samuel P. Taylor State Park on June first. My favorite tree is the rewood.

Filmore – There have been so many good shows at The Fillmore; too many to list.

Pierce – Jeff’s ears are Pierced.

Buchannon – Ron has driven his van on Buchannon St. in San Francisco.

Lincoln – Here’s our problem. You have not responded to my letters; we have not played with Lincoln Logs lately. I’ve never met anyone named Abraham, and until you right me back I’m going to recommend that Ron not drive his van on Lincoln St. in San Francisco.

Johnson – Jeff was friends with Jon Kitamura growing up. He is the son of Roy and I hear that this guy is solid.

Grant – Grants are great things. They provide funding for education, the arts, and healthcare, etc.

Hayes – Issac Hayes; ladies man.

Garfield – Garfield is a lazy cat; Jeff is a Tiger; I’m equal parts kitten and tiger; black panthers are native to North Africa and Asia.

Arthur – There would be no Golden Girls be without Bea Arthur and there may not have been a Great Sitting be without The Golden Girls.

Cleveland (first name Grover) – There is no better muppet than Grover. I like the way his arms and head shake around. I like him better than Elmo.

Note: Jeff spent much of third grade learning the names of the presidents. He can recite them from memory only up until Cleveland so this is where our list will stop.

Download Video

Christian Kiefer has suggested that Jeff memorize the rest of the Presidents sometime soon. As Jeff makes improvements in his presidential recitation I’ll post videos here so that you can follow his progress.

Lincoln Bedroom. I beg of you. Please take us in when we reach Washington D.C. I eagerly await your reply.

Sincerely
Mike schwartz
mikeschwartz@sonic.net
www.thegreatsitting.com

If you are not the lincoln bedroom but would like to help us out there are options. You can introduce us to someone named Abraham; construct something out of Lincoln Logs and tell us about it, let us stay in your bedroom, livingroom, back yard etc. or you can enter the Lincoln Look-Alike Photo contest. Yes we are having another contest!

Continue reading for contest details...

Win! Win! Win! The Great Sitting Lincoln Look-Alike Photo Contest!

One lucky winner will be awarded a Great Sitting T-Shirt designed by our favorite illustrator Keri Smith.

Rules:
You must take a photo of yourself, a friend, family member, or someone else that you think looks like President Lincoln. Subject need not know that they are being photographed. Photos will be judged on composition, originality, and to what extent the subject of the photo looks like Abraham Lincoln.

One copy of the photo must be sent to the White House. Please enclose a short note with the photo suggesting that Jeff and Mike of the Great Sitting be allowed to sleep in the Lincoln Bedroom. A second digital copy should be e-mailed to mikeschwartz@sonic.net for judging. This contest concept has developed rather quickly. There is not yet a celebrity panel of judges but I’m working on that…

Contest Deadline August 10

The White House
Attn Lincoln Bedroom - The Great Sitting Lincoln Look-Alike Contest
1600 Pennsylvania Avenue NW
Washington, DC 20500

mikeschwartz@sonic.net

Posted by Mike at July 12, 2004 07:42 AM